Nienawidzę tego

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Znasz ten moment, kiedy czytając ogłoszenie o pracę widzisz w wymaganiach pozycję, która wywołuje u Ciebie ciarki? Patrzysz „doskonała znajomość excela” i myślisz sobie „o nie, nienawidzę tego, to nie dla mnie”. Albo kiedy idziesz na trening do lokalnego klubu, zaczynają się zajęcia i nagle każą Ci robić przysiady i już wiesz, że trzeba było zostać w domu?

Oh Hell Nooo!

Są takie chwile w naszym życiu, kiedy trafiamy na mur. Nasza reakcja jest mniej więcej taka jak Fluffiego wyżej. Po czym obracamy się na pięcie i idziemy w przeciwnym kierunku…

Stracone okazje

Mur – jak wskazałem we wstępie – różne ma twarze. Dla jednego będzie to jakaś kompetencja w pracy, dla innego jakieś koszmarne ćwiczenie czy element gry, w którym jest po prostu do bani albo którego się boi. Dla większości ludzi murem jest np konieczność prowadzenia wystąpień publicznych lub robienie regularnych prezentacji dla obcych ludzi.

Mur to każdy argument jaki znajdujesz na to, by się wycofać, by nie spróbować, by nie zrobić kroku do przodu.

Wszystkie stracone okazje

Przypomnij sobie teraz na chwilę WSZYSTKIE okazje, w których mogłeś sięgnąć w życiu po więcej ale trafiłeś na wspomniany mur. Przypomnij je sobie i najlepiej spisz na kartce. Tak, teraz. Weź kartkę i spisz. Niech to będzie coś jak:

  • „Nie poszedłem na basen, bo wstydziłem się, że zobaczą moje fałdki
  • „Nie wysłałem swojego CV, bo wymagali ode mnie znajomości XYZ
  • „Nie zagrałem w teatrze, bo bałem się tremy
  • „Nie poszedłem z nimi, bo bałem się, że będę musiał śpiewać
  • „Nie dołączyłem do gry, bo jestem słaby i bałem się, że mnie wyśmieją

Dwa razy BO

Zauważ, że po BO pojawia się jedna z dwóch rzeczy. Albo jest coś, czego nie potrafisz a przez to się boisz. Albo się po prostu boisz, bez większego konkretnego uzasadnienia (nie, kompleksy to nie jest żadne uzasadnienie, żeby sobie utrudniać samemu życie i odmawiać korzystania z niego w pełni).

1) Jeśli po Twoim BO pojawiają się więc myśli typu „się wstydziłem”, „się bałem” to musisz wiedzieć, że murem tu jesteś Ty sam. A konkretniej Twoje złe nastawienie. To jest cholernie ważne, żeby zrozumieć, że to TY a nie INNI ludzie w tym momencie ograniczają Twoje życieStrasznie często mówimy, że obawiamy się, że XYZ pomyśli o nas tak czy inaczej podczas gdy ten ktoś będzie w pełni skupiony na zabawie czy po prostu pozytywnym wykorzystaniu wspólnego czasu.

To się nazywa projekcją. Przerzucamy na innych swoje własne ZŁE mniemanie o sobie.

Niepotrzebnie. Bo raz, że inni ludzie wcale o nas tak dużo nie myślą 🙂 A dwa, że jak już myślą w trakcie wspólnego spędzania czasu to raczej cieszą się chwilą i tym, że jesteśmy obok zamiast rozbijać nas na pierwiastki zła 🙂

2) Jeśli po Twoim BO pojawia się jednak coś typu „Nie potrafię” „Nie znam” „Nie umiem” to … ciesz się! Oto bowiem właśnie masz tę złotą instrukcję, jak polepszyć Twoje życie.

Serio. Jeśli Twoją największą przeszkodą jest znajomość jednego czy dwóch programów to zostaw wszystko inne, wszystko co zbędne i NAUCZ SIĘ ICH.

Zamień słabość na swoją największą wartość

Kiedy ja zaczynałem swoją drogą zawodową patrzyłem na ogłoszenia pracy i z ofert, które mnie ciekawiły wypisywałem rzeczy, których nie potrafię. Potem przeglądałem CV ludzi, którzy osiągnęli to co chciałem i patrzyłem co takiego tam mają, czego ja nie mam, a czego móglbym się nauczyć.

Potem miałem gotową instrukcję. Instrukcję ŁATWIEJSZEGO ŻYCIA.

Wiedząc bowiem co jest/może być moim murem, który staje między mną a upragnioną pracą czy celem… po prostu się tego uczyłem i mur znikał. Jeśli czegoś mocno mocno nienawidzisz to się z tym zaprzyjaźnij. Spędź każdą wolną chwilę z tym gównem i zostań jego mistrzem. Opanuj je i NIC już nie będzie Twoim problemem.

Nie chce Ci się? To zrób jedną rzecz. Wyobraź sobie te wszystkie chwile, kiedy sobie odmawiałeś i pomyśl, że już umiesz/nie boisz się/nie wstydzisz. Wyobraź sobie te chwile, kiedy się nie cofasz tylko mówisz „O, potrafię to” „O, fajnie, mogę”. Ba, powiedz to na głos. Powiedz „Cześć, nazywam się Karol i znam Excela i nie boję się występować publicznie”, zamknij oczy i poczuj, że tak jest.

Fajne uczucie? Nadal Ci się nie chce?

Wszystko to co sprawia, że czujesz, że nie możesz mieć więcej, jest jednocześnie instrukcją jak ten stan zmienić… i mieć więcej.

Nie musisz nie umieć

Już będę kończył. Chcę jednak żebyś sobie wbił na zawsze do głowy – nie musisz nie umieć. Serio. Ja mam zawsze problem ze zrozumieniem, czemu ktoś rok w rok narzeka, że czegoś nie potrafi a w międzyczasie nie próbuje tego zmienić. Naprawdę nie jesteś skazany dzisiaj na to, żeby nie umieć. 

Internet jest pełen darmowych kursów, jest pełen tanich kursów. Internet jest pełen instruktarzy jak poprawić swoje największe słabości. Jak się lepiej rozciągnąć. Jak nauczyć się grać w zespole itd itd.

Tylko w tym roku rozpocząłem naukę edycji video w programie, którego nie cierpiałem i tylko w tym roku zrobiłem już 70% kursu obsługi programu do pracy nad dźwiękiem. Kosztowało to w sumie 24 euro. 24 euro i kilka godzin i już mam jeden mur w życiu mniej.

A Ty? Co robisz ze swoimi murami?

Odwracasz się na pięcie i odmawiasz sobie czegoś nowego/lepszego w życiu czy jednak burzysz go – tak jak powinieneś?

Zadanie

  • Krok 1 – Zrób listę tych rzeczy, które Cię blokują
  • Krok 2 – Pobierz formularz Kwadracikowego wyzwania
  • Krok 3 – Wpisz w jedną z pozycji pracę nad tym co wypisałeś w kroku 1
  • Krok 4 – Profit 🙂

Podziel się w komentarzu nad czym zamierzasz popracować. Niech ta deklaracja będzie początkiem drogi do lepszego.

Share.

About Author

Hej, jestem autorem bloga Fitback.pl . Chciałbym Ci pokazać jak możesz przedłużyć swoje życie jednocześnie korzystając i czerpiąc z każdego dnia tak jakby jutra miało nie być :) Wierzę, że warto robić to co daje radość dziś ale nie wyjdzie Ci bokiem za lat 10-15. Nie wierzę w drogę na skróty.

70 komentarzy

  1. Chce nauczyć się programować. Jestem na studiach technicznych i mam problem z programowaniem, nie chce żeby to był mur, który będzie mnie blokował. Zrobię TO! Dzięki Arvind 🙂

    • Sprawdź koniecznie kursy na http://udemy.com, są teraz mega przeceny i kursy za 300 euro kosztują 12. Są też takie z programowaniem i słyszałem bardzo dużo dobrych rzeczy na ich temat (np te mobilne są oparte na przykładach więc tworzysz ucząc się).

      Trzymam kciuki!

  2. sportowaofiaralosu on

    Kiedy patrzę pięć lat wstecz, jestem sobie bardzo wdzięczna za to, że zdecydowałam się zmierzyć ze swoją największą słabością – wychowaniem fizycznym. Z klasowego pośmiewiska i „tej ostatniej” wybieranej do drużyny, stałam się tą z najlepszą kondycją. Nienawiść i niechęć do ćwiczeń towarzyszyła mi wtedy przez cały czas. Po przyjściu ze szkoły pracowałam nad swoją sprawnością codziennie. Początkowo napędzał mnie strach przed kolejnym wyśmianiem i komentarzami kolegów. To bolało, niczego na świecie nienawidziłam bardziej od siatkówki. Po dwóch latach ćwiczeń nauczyciel zaproponował mi sks’y, pół roku później pojechałam na moje pierwsze w życiu zawody. Z „biegowego buraka”, który łapał zadyszkę na 100m odcinkach zapracowałam sobie na swoje pierwsze w życiu 10km. Z trójki z wf’u w gimnazjum skoczyłam do szóstki w liceum. Dzisiaj nie wyobrażam sobie życia bez sportu. Zyskałam wiarę w siebie i pasję, której nikt mi nie odbierze. Nie żałuję czasu spędzonego na pracy nad sobą. Wiem, że było warto… Nie warto rezygnować 🙂

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